I found some notes I was making one evening, while we were waiting for our Norwegian Cruise Lines Personal Cruise Consulant (PCC) to arrive for dinner (we were in Miami, sailing the next day, so we decided to ask our PCC to dinner, since he’s booked cruises for us for nine years and we had never met him in person.)

I realized while we were waiting for Jorge to arrive that taking a person to dinner specifically because he had helped Virginia spend thousands of dollars might mean we had a slight cruising problem. Then, I realized that was probably not the only sign.

Here’s the list from that night, edited for clarity (never write notes in a bar):

• Your PCC is on your Christmas Card list
• You invite your PCC to dinner
• You invite your PCC to dinner at Scarpetta because you’re trying to outdo your friends who had already taken him to dinner before their cruise
• Your PCC is in your phone speed dial
• Your PCC is in your phone speed dial ahead of your spouse
• You have 3 future cruises booked and you’re looking at itineraries
• You spend an hour determining why the sea is rough
• You are friends with multiple crew members on Facebook
• You are friends with multiple officers on Facebook 
• You can say “new ship smell” non-ironically
• Having the Hotel Director recognize you at the Meet & Greet, because he remembers you from another Meet & Greet
• Having a favorite bartender on multiple ships
• Knowing when crew members change ships
• Telling a Cruise Director you know his friend, another Cruise Director, and that he says, “Hello”
• You keep saying, “Alexa, find me a cruise” just to see what will happen
• You’re afraid to visit the Philippines because you might be recognized