Tag Archives: Cruises

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CDC Comments Period End Soon

Visit https://beta.regulations.gov/document/CDC-2020-0087-0001 for information on filing your comments on the CDC Cruise Ship Planning request. You have until September 21, 2020.

Reading the questions and reading between the lines, you begin to realize that somebody at the CDC HATES cruise ships. The amount of questions about what cruise ship operators should do, and the amount of money they should spend just shows a prejudice in favor of all other modes of transportation.

The CDC decided this week to remove a number of restrictions on air travel (see here.) There was never a “no-fly” order. So, if airlines can just provide “education” to their passengers, how is it fair that cruise lines are responsible for all COVID-19 cases that came to light on a ship?

The usual comments against cruising is that it’s not necessary. Neither is air travel. Heard of Zoom lately?

Part of my comments were driven by thinking about all of the transportation required for me personally to go on a cruise. I wanted to share that, and let others think about how likely it is that outbreaks spontaneously happen only on cruise ships.

My wife and I live in Dallas. If we sail from PortMiami for a seven-day cruise, we will fly in the day before. So, prior to boarding the ship, we will

  • Take a cab or Uber to DFW or Love Field
  • Be inside an international airport terminal
  • Be inside an airplane for almost two hours (with recirculated air)
  • Be inside another international airport terminal (Miami or Fort Lauderdale)
  • Take a cab or Uber to the hotel
  • Be inside a hotel lobby
  • Be inside a hotel room
  • Visit a restaurant
  • Take a cab or Uber to PortMiami
  • Be inside the port terminal (an international port)
  • Board the ship

So, there are a lot of people I will come into contact with before boarding the ship. Uber says riders and drivers must wear a mask. I know from UberEats that this is not always the case. There are no checks at airports.

Even if the cruise ship checks me immediately before departure, I could have contracted the disease (or any other disease) along the way to the ship. However, the CDC (and therefore, the masses) will blame the ship.

So, cruise travel is the problem?

Unless you hammer all of the travel industry out of existence, singling out cruise travel is patently unfair.

Please comment. Please read the instructions! There are specific questions to answer. Answer the ones you find critical to you. Use the format they request. Just posting, “Cruise now, dammit!” or “Ban cruises forever!” really doesn’t help.

It’s not the ship’s fault.

Cruise Ship Saturday

I’ll admit it. I’m stir-crazy. Perhaps not as bad as one of my friends who is threatening to sail away on a mattress, but it’s close.

We’re all stuck at home. We’re all stuck on land until at least Halloween (for now.)

Let’s fix it. Let’s have a virtual cruise. We’ll just declare the house a cruise ship. Just tell people you’re sailing on the Norwegian Carnival of the Seas.

Since everything I could ever consider (Tacos, Lasagne, Beer, Ice Cream, Left-handed People, Talk Like A Pirate) has a national day, I declare tomorrow and every Saturday, as Cruise Ship Saturday.

Preparation for Sailing

Here’s how to “cruise ship” your house:

  • Place at least two bottles of booze in every other room of the house. These are your bars. (Use your bedroom for one of the bars, so you have 24-hour bar service without leaving bed.) For an extra touch, separate the booze by types, so you have a Margarita bar, an English Pub, a wine bar, and a pool bar.
  • If you have a pool, block off at least two-thirds of it so it is the proper size for a cruise ship pool. If you don’t, make a small puddle in your backyard with the hose.
  • Block off at least one bedroom. This is your suites area. You can’t go in there during the cruise because Not Worthy.
  • Spread out all the food in your refrigerator on your dining room table. This is the 24-Hour Buffet. Organize the food by country or region (Chinese leftovers in one corner, then Mexican leftovers, then cold pizza.)
  • Wrap towels around your dogs. They are now service animals, and ready to sail with you.

A Lovely Cruise

  • Have your partner get up at 5am and go put towels on all the lawn chairs in your yard and patio. The chairs are now yours for the rest of the day. Go back to bed.
  • Have an early breakfast at the buffet. Make sure to always fill your plate. It’s fine if you leave food, you paid for it! Have your partner make you some eggs to order at the Omelet Station. Send them back.
  • While you are finishing breakfast, have your partner go make the bed and replace the towels. Your partner is your room steward. Remember to tip for good service.
  • When you see your partner in the hall, ask why there is no ice in the bedroom.
  • At 9:15am sharp, report to your front porch. Stand around for fifteen minutes for no apparent reason, then wander around your neighborhood, practicing proper social distancing. Use masks as locally required. Point out the other neighbors’ houses to your partner, and identify who lives where. This is the Local Sites to See excursion. You are the tour guide. If you find a garage sale, spend an inordinate amount of time there. When you get back, wait ten minutes before going into the house. Everyone came back at once. Charge your partner $50.
  • After the excursion, cool off by the pool. Take all the towels off all the chairs and dump them in a pile on the lawn. Have your partner come ask you what happened to his or her towel. Have an argument about towels, rights of possession and chair ownership. Buy your partner drinks until he or she calms down.
  • At 3pm sharp, go to the living room and make 37 different drinks by mixing tequila with every other liquid in your house. Garnish each drink with a lime wedge. This is the Margaritas class. Charge your partner $50.
  • At 4pm sharp, if you haven’t passed out, go to the living room and make 37 different drinks by mixing vodka with every other liquid in your house. Serve all drinks in martini glasses. This is the Martini class. Charge your partner $50.
  • Dress up for dinner. This requires polo shirts and at least dress shorts for men, nice dresses for women. (Men, wear sandals and tell your partner you knew it wasn’t really a rule. Women, make your men go put real shoes on.) You have anytime dining, so just go to the kitchen table whenever you want. Wait for ten minutes outside the kitchen table because you didn’t book a specific time to dine. Order one of everything on the menu, because Cruise Ship. Have three desserts.
  • Explain to your partner that he really should have been wearing a jacket and tie because Formal Night.
  • After dinner, go to your room and change out of your dress clothes, because Vacation.
  • Head out to the pool. Play all your old Jimmy Buffett CDs at full volume. Play Margaritaville every five minutes. It’s a Calypso Party. Drink the rest of the tequila.
  • Wander into the living room. Play all your old 60s R&B CDs at full volume. Play Shout every five minutes. It’s a Toga Party. Drink the rest of the vodka.
  • Stop in each of the bars and have a drink. It’s a Pub Crawl. For small houses or enlarged livers, do the circuit twice.
  • Order UberEats or Grubhub at midnight from whatever random restaurant is still open in your area. Complain to your partner that your favorite dish is not available, when they have it in the restaurant during regular hours.
  • Go to the buffet while waiting for delivery because Starving. Discover all the food has been replaced by four Hershey bars and a bag of M&Ms. It’s the Midnight Chocolate Buffet.
  • When the food order arrives, take it to your partner in the bedroom. It’s room service. Charge your partner $12.95. When you finish your snacks, leave your plates in the hall.
  • After your midnight snack, go play Nintendo or your XBox. (Older people, play cards or Monopoly.) Bet your partner you can win. It’s the Casino.
  • After spending all the cash collected from your partner in the casino, call it a night. Drink any of the booze left in your bedroom. It’s the minibar. Charge your partner $7.50 per drink.
  • Make sure you’re all packed up. Disembarkation starts at 7am and you have an early time to disembark.
  • At 7am, find a statement under your door with a bunch of charges you don’t recognize. Wonder how much you actually had to drink. Blame the charges on your partner.
  • Fill in a survey two days after your cruise. Bitch about the pool chair situation and the excess charges.

A Bit Less Hopeful

So, Princess is out until December, Norwegian until after Halloween and we’re waiting for the other shoes to drop.

I’m thinking canceling our Christmas cruise was the right idea. I’m depressed, since that was our last possible vacation this year, but I’m less depressed than if they had canceled it out from under us after final payment. We still have friends with a booking, but they’re wondering what’s going to happen. We had another one cancel because if she got quarantined getting home from the cruise, she’d miss work.

Carnival canceled our Panama Canal cruise in May 2021 but it’s because they’re repositioning all the ships they aren’t selling, and the Carnival Radiance won’t be in Galveston, after all. There’s also no replacement, so the cruise was just canceled.

We just booked a similar cruise on Carnival Dream for October 2022. We sail in 815 days. It’s a 14-day cruise instead of nine so we get a couple of extra ports. We also booked an aft corner balcony.

As I said about next May’s canceled cruise, “it’s gotta be fixed by then.”

It’s ugly.

In spite of that, people seem to still be booking cruises. If you see a deal you like now, take it. (If you need ideas, let me know.)

Cruise lines need income, so if people are making deposits, that helps. It probably doesn’t help as much as making final payments, but it’s a pandemic. I think they’ll take what they can get.

One major (possibly) victory – the CDC is asking for public comment on restarting cruising. Here’s a link to the notice. If you want to ever cruise again, now would be the time to speak up!

The Captain Theory

A Captain of a cruise ship is actually a senior manager of a line of business. Each ship has a profit and loss statement, many levels of middle managers and hundreds of staff. At the top, is the Captain.

The Captain usually has a Staff Captain (second in command) who runs the engineering (making the ship run) and a Hotel Director who runs the hotel (making the passengers happy.) The Captain is also responsible for the safe navigation of the ship.

That said, I have found there are two types of Captains on cruise ships – there are brand ambassadors who focus on the customers, and those like we had this week who are invisible to the customers and manage the staff and drive the ship.

This week, we finished a cruise on the MSC Divina, where we rarely saw the Captain. Most of the senior staff were invisible. It was not our best cruise. I can’t tell you the Captain’s name without going to look it up.

Also this week, USA Today announced the ten best cruise ships for families. The winner was MSC Seaside. We sailed on the Seaside in May. Captain DiPalma was at all the functions. He seemed to be everywhere. He recognized me at the second function we attended together. He came to the Cruise Critic Meet & Greet to offer a toast. We’re friends on Facebook now.

The ship is a reflection of the Captain. Captain DiPalma runs a happy ship. I believe that is one reason why MSC Seaside beat Disney and why MSC Divina is not anywhere on the list.

Many people always ask who the Cruise Director or Hotel Director on a ship is before they travel. You might also look at the top. The Captain is where the ship begins.

MSC Divina – Day 2

Wow. This breakfast order did not look like this much on the card. Room service breakfast was served on time and everything was correct. It was tasty, as well. The salmon was on toast (not a bagel?) and there weren’t capers, but it was good and I usually don’t like salmon – except on a bagel. The meat tray was ham, turkey, salami and mortadella. The Egg McMuffin knock-off had a real poached egg and Hollandaise. Virginia said it was tasty but it needs to be served hotter than room service. The coffee was good.

The Cruise Critic Meet & Greet was fun but not very informative. We were a couple of minutes late, but people were milling about so I don’t think we missed anything. The free drink choices were Prosecco, non-alcoholic fruit punch or a vodka Martini. Day drinking at its finest.

Our cruise director ran the meeting – unlike the MSC Seaside, the Captain did not attend. Like the Seaside, the host spoke and did not introduce any of the other staff that attended. We then took a group photo, Virginia was asked to cut the cake (MSC always has a cake) and after everyone was served, the staff filed out.

So, no introductions, no little cards with contact info, just booze and cake.

We took most of the afternoon off since it was a sea day but windy enough to cancel a lot of outdoor events.

I did have a shave in the spa and managed to tour much of it trying to find the check-in desk. We will have to spend time there later since it is included with the Yacht Club.

This was the first formal (“elegant”) night so we had photos with the Captain. So, we now know he exists.

Portraits with the Captain were in the bar which is our muster station, so we knew how to get there.

We were early so we sat in the bar to listen to the music (Christmas songs, including “Christmas Time is Here”). The waitress came by with a tray of Prosecco, non-alcoholic fruit punch and Rum Sours. I had never heard of a Rum Sour. It was good. Virginia hated it.

After a minute, I realized everyone was being offered drinks. We were not in the Yacht Club. We were not asked for a card. We were given … free drinks. This was a first on any cruise and this is our 21st.

The formal night menu in Le Muse was disappointing – the entrees were two vegetarian selections and two seafood. The escargot appetizer was decent but I’ve had better (at Le Bistro, for example.) Virginia and I both had filets. I had Crepes Suzette for dessert because it’s not like you see that on a menu many places these days. It was excellent and saved the meal.

We stopped by the room to change and someone had delivered a box of macrons. To diabetics. Things are looking up.

Back to the Top Sail lounge for late night (for us, anyway.) Different singer, same pronunciations. Smooth jazz is not a way to keep people involved and if you have a singer performing with a prerecorded track, it’s watching professional karaoke.

The room service menu is really limited. We finally ordered pizza for a late-night snack. Room service options is one place Carnival kicks other lines’ asses. All you offer is three sandwiches or a couple of salads? Yes, I know we could go to the buffet, but on Seaside, the buffet after about 10pm was sandwiches and pizza.

Having the buffet open 22 hours a day is an MSC selling point. Having decent selections 22 hours a day would be even better.

The concierge handled our pizza order. The concierge this afternoon got my shave appointment. The one this morning told us how to traverse the ship most efficiently. So far, the concierge has been more useful than the butler, which is the same as the Norwegian Haven.

Time to see how the pizza is. My order was wrong but it looks good. It’s pizza, how bad can it be? (It was very tasty.)

We lose an hour tonight. Curse you, time zones!

MSC Divina – Day 1

I am behind on this and I’m not journaling as I was on the MSC Seaside, but this is our first time in the Yacht Club, and I hate long reviews, so I’ll write as we go. Edits as I’m corrected or remember more.

So, weirdness first. I’m writing this in the Top Sail lounge, the exclusive Yacht Club bar, it’s 9:15pm and there are a dozen people in here, at most. This I do not understand.

I’m getting ahead of myself.

Embarkation was smooth but we’re in the Yacht Club. That said, Miami cab drivers suck. Our cab driver would not take us to the pre-board tent for the Yacht Club and the cops directing traffic don’t want to admit there are two ways onto the ship. While it’s not directly MSC’s fault, if you tell your highest-paying guests they have a private doorway, you have to tell the ground staff there are two doors.

After I yelled at the cab driver, and Virginia and I both gave a lady cop death looks, we just got out in the middle of the street by the White Tent.

After that, embarkation was easy – although we didn’t have a private line for security, we just cut around most of the line and then went to the VIP room. It’s designed for people to wait, but we got to the port late for us, so there was no real waiting. We were lead onto the ship, showed how to use our door cards for priority elevator access (hit or miss), and lead to the Top Sail lounge.

After greetings, we went to our room. Deluxe Suite 15021 is just down the hall from the lounge, between the lounge and the exit to the elevators.

There are four banks of elevators. This is a much better design than Norweigan’s Breakaway class and MSC Seaside which have two. Why? People need to go up and down. A lot. Advantage, Divina.

The private restaurant is aft and all the cabins are forward. If you don’t mind walking on deck, you can get there on 15. If it looks like the sky is about to open and you’re in thirty knot winds, you have to go down, across and up. We would use deck seven to go across because there are lots of public areas on seven.

There are no room 17s or deck seventeen because 17 is an unlucky number for Italians. I have to find out why. 13 is unlucky because it was the number of people at the Last Supper. Italians probably also count the caterers.

Le Muse, the Yacht Club private restaurant is nice, it’s just on the opposite end of the ship from the cabins. The menu is a bit limited, but the food is tasty and the waiters are attentive. I do see how Americans who have no been beyond the borders might freak out because most of the choices at lunch were Continental. The classic menu has a filet but I could see getting tired of steak every day if you don’t know what any of the other dishes are.

Muster was chaotic but better than MSC Seaside. We managed to get signed in this time but we didn’t have our life jackets – and this is the first cruise since 2010 that they were required. Virginia was having back issues, so instead of going back to the room, we just said we hadn’t been to the room yet.

Muster on MSC is pointless. All is does is make people find their muster station once, which I suppose is useful information but nobody pays attention to anything else, and since it’s in four or five languages, it takes forever. So, we watched people take cell photos of each other in their life jackets, and then everyone left. If MSC ever has an emergency, people are dying.

This bothers me. I’m sure that the drill meets SOLAS requirements and I watch the video and read the info sheets, but they need a better system if they are trying to actually teach people what to do in an emergency.

Most of the afternoon was in the Top Sail lounge, watching the sail away. As it’s forward, it’s a great view. Plus, there weren’t many people there.

Dinner was back in Le Muse, the Yacht Club private restaurant. I had risotto which was amazing. It was “I think I’m going to cry” good. It was the kind of good that would make a Keto sister cheat.

We stopped by the lounge on the way back to the room and listened to the singer for way longer than we planned. All the singers we’ve heard have been good, but I’m pretty sure are English as a Second Language because they are singing syllables and not words, so every once in a while, it’s “What did she say?”

While I’m typing this, I heard “Just the Two of Us.” While I remember “we can make it if we try”, apparently some think it’s “we can Mack it if we try.” Who is Mack?

The first night was a woman with an acoustic who managed to do “Here Comes the Sun”, “Bad Moon Rising” and “Wish You Were Here” (Pink Floyd by request) in one set. That will be hard to beat.

We went to bed when we realized we had to be functional by 10am for the Cruise Critic Meet & Greet. Since it takes us forever to get out of the room in the morning, we need some leeway.

Virginia put out a card for room service breakfast.

As I was falling asleep, I realized I had not been asked for my card for anything since we boarded. We had drinks in the bar, wine with dinner and more drinks and except for opening the cabin door (and powering the lights), nobody had asked to see my card.

We did have photos taken but it’s not an automated system yet, so they don’t take your card or cabin number. The photos are on the wall. The ones that have you in them are yours. I thought Virginia was going to ask how to tell which photos were hers, but she caught herself.

The wind is up and it’s a very bumpy cruise. Otherwise, a good first day.

Side notes: the butlers are not fawning over us. I’m a bit relieved since I don’t like hovering but I’m wondering about some of the reviews we saw.

One of our pillowcases seemed to have a spot on it. No big deal. It looked like blood. Now it’s a big deal. Virginia told the room steward who showed the proper amount of horror and quickly replaced it. Later that night, there was another one. So, either someone is marking pillow cases with nail polish or there’s a hemophiliac in Laundry.

The Sharps container was requested and immediately brought to the room when we arrived so the Seaside Sharps chase was averted. Guest Services called on day two to make we had received it.

The minibar was restocked with sodas I will drink since it’s included with the room.

This us our first cruise trying to limit carbs. That removes virtually every “island” drink. The struggle is real.

Confusion

Apparently, there is such a thing as too many cruises scheduled. This may not be the first time we’ve had this many cruises scheduled, and we have twenty under our belts, but I know it is the first time with this many cruises on this many lines. I’m getting confused.

When we decided to branch out from Norwegian, we did so with a vengeance. We now have four cruises on four lines in the next two years. After a certain point, keeping all the ports and ships straight is difficult, even with TripIt.

This year’s Christmas cruise is on the MSC Divina, in the Yacht Club. This will be our first non-Norwegian Christmas cruise ever (it’s our 11th Christmas cruise.) This was the year we finally price-compared and discovered Norwegian is very proud of their product. While staying loyal and being Platinum Plus are great, MSC status-matched us to Diamond level in their program and the Yacht Club was not much more expensive than a Norwegian balcony. Consider that for a second. A ship within a ship, with private bar, restaurant, pool, butler and concierge was only slightly more than an aft balcony. So, time to switch.

This cruise would create all sorts of planning because it was supposed to be our first MSC cruise. However, as some of you remember, we went on the MSC Seaside at the beginning of the summer to protect our status-matched Diamond (then Black) status, so now it’s our second MSC cruise and we’re not that panicked about it. (We probably should be.)

This will be our first cruise on the Divina, and our first in the Yacht Club. Even though we are in the Yacht Club, we received an invitation to upgrade. The lowest-priced choice was an Executive suite, which has a panoramic view. I’m pretty sure this means ocean-view or window. I’m not sure balcony people would give up a balcony for a bit more space.

Our second scheduled cruise is our third anniversary cruise (third cruise for one of our anniversaries), and our first cruise on Royal Caribbean. We really didn’t mean to make a tradition of anniversary cruises, but we had a vow renewal by the Captain for our 15th, and went with friends for their anniversary last year, since their anniversary is on Valentine’s Day (very romantic) and ours is on February 11 (it was a Friday), so when our 20th was approaching, we decided to try something new by sailing Royal Caribbean (going to ports we’ve visited many times.)

Never get married in February. It’s so close to Christmas that planning cruises for both tend to get intertwined. If the two cruises were on the same line, I’d be completely lost by now, instead of just confused. It also means your final payment is due just about the time you’re buying Christmas presents. Sorry, family.

We will be sailing on the Liberty of the Seas, departing out of Galveston, which means we can drive to the port. We saw the ship once, when we were taking a dolphin cruise around Galveston. The dolphins like surfing by the large ships. Galveston is the closest port to us, so we can drive pretty easily. The hotels are expensive, but not much worse than Miami, and the driving costs are enough less than flying to cover it. Plus, you don’t have to fly.

The only problem with Galveston is that most of the cruises from there go to the same Western Caribbean destinations: a port in Jamaica, Grand Cayman and Cozumel. Sometimes, Costa Maya. They are all fun ports, but we’re really going to see what Royal is like.

Christmas 2020 is already planned because we got invited to join some of our friends on their Christmas cruise. (Since we joined them on their Anniversary cruise last year and everyone survived, we thought it would work.) This will be on the Norwegian Pearl, which is thankfully not a megaship, and a ship we have sailed and enjoyed before. (I prefer her sister ship, the Norwegian Jade, but I will take any of the Jewel class over most other Norwegian ships.) It’s also a two-week cruise over Christmas and New Year’s, which is great for vacation, and also means we will see some islands we don’t get to visit often. Here’s hoping the itinerary doesn’t get changed in the meantime.

In May 2021, we’re going to do a partial transit of the Panama Canal on the Carnival Radiance. This is the third time we’ve scheduled a Panama Canal voyage, but I think we may actually make it this time. It’s a partial transit, so we round-trip from Galveston (one plus), and it also means you skip all the ports on the west coast of Mexico (a major plus, since Virginia has no interest and to me, those ports just add days that I don’t want to spend vacation on.)

Here’s why I think we’ll actually go this time:

  • It’s a partial transit. We will traverse the Gatun Locks to get into Gatun Lake, but that’s it. So, we’re not going from sea to shining sea, but we’re doing a 90-foot change in altitude while going through the lock. As a bonus, we’ll sail back through the lock that evening.
  • It’s much cheaper than other Canal trips we’ve booked. Part of this is because it’s a partial transit, but mostly this is because it’s on Carnival. Even with the spa balcony we booked, it’s still much cheaper than the least-expensive Norwegian transit we had ever booked.
  • Carnival Radiance will be almost a new ship. The Carnival Victory is going into dry dock this year and emerging as the Carnival Radiance.
  • We sail from Galveston. For some reason, the eight hours of so of round-trip driving time on I-45 is much less stressful than flying to Florida.

Now, we just have to double-check the excursions, to make sure all our ports are covered.

Hurricanes and Contracts

I’m writing this because it’s happening again. Hurricane Dorian is in the Atlantic heading towards Florida the Carolinas. PortMiami is on alert. Cruises are being rescheduled. Ports are being changed. So, the torches and pitchforks are coming out on the cruise line discussion groups.
Hurricane Season is June until November each year in the Atlantic. Many cruisers may not know there’s an actual season, and that it happens every year. These are the people who just think cruises seem to be cheaper this time of year.
Hurricanes are the cruise lines’ worst nightmare. One hurricane can disrupt multiple ships and can close ports long after they’re gone (look at the ports damaged by Irma and Maria in 2017, many of which are still rebuilding). While the cruise lines scramble to reroute ships, they get to deal with thousands of outraged passengers.
Why are they outraged? Not only because their cruise was delayed or rerouted. It because they assume they’re getting refunds because their cruise is delayed or rerouted. This is the time of year when people finally read their cruise contracts. Unfortunately, it’s usually after they’ve been told their cruise was changed or canceled.
I already talked about cruise insurance. Just get it. It’s important. It’s really important during hurricane season. However, much like reading a cruise contract, you need to know what your policy covers. Here’s why: cruise lines hate canceling cruises. It’s much easier to reschedule or reroute it, because then it sailed. So, if they reroute you, there’s no claim – unless your policy covers it. If the new route skips the only port you really wanted to visit (why didn’t you just go there?), there’s no claim – unless your policy covers it. If you decide not to go, it’s not covered unless you have a cancel for any reason policy.
So, read your policy.
If you want to know why you need cruise insurance, and understand what it covers, read your cruise contract. Then, when you’re incensed at your cruise line of choice, read another line’s. There’re probably very similar. Here’s an example, with some [embedded comments]:
[Cruise Line] may change the duration and/or itinerary of the cruise at any time. [This isn’t even in the fine print. This one sentence is really all you need to know. However, a lawyer wrote it, so let’s continue.] The Vessel shall be entitled to leave and enter ports with or without pilots or tugs, to tow and assist other vessels in any circumstances, to return to or enter any port at the Master’s discretion and for any purpose, and to deviate in any direction or for any purpose from the direct or usual course, and to omit or change any or all port calls, arrival or departure times, with or without notice, for any reason whatsoever, including but not limited to safety, security, adverse weather, hurricanes, tornadoes, strikes, tides, hostilities, civil unrest, port closings, emergency debarkations of Guests or crew, late air, sea, car or motor coach departures or arrivals, mechanical breakdowns, US or foreign governmental advisories or travel warnings, all such deviations being considered as forming part of and included in the proposed voyage. [In case you didn’t understand the short version, this was the long one. This is still not fine print.] Except as provided in Clause 7(c) with regard to early termination of a voyage, [Cruise Line] shall have no liability for any compensation or other damages in such circumstances for any change in itinerary, ports of call, ports of embarkation and debarkation, and/or or duration of the cruise, other than as provided by [Cruise Line]’s change of itinerary policy at the time Guest or his agent acknowledges receipt and acceptance of the terms and conditions of the cruise ticket contract. [Basically, “no refunds.” You acknowledged receipt when you blindly clicked through on the website. You don’t read software licenses either, do you?] [Cruise Line]’s change of itinerary policy can be found at on [Cruise Line]’s Website or at [Cruise Line]’s FAQ page. [Actually, the link fails, but it really can’t say much to undo everything here.]
That’s only one clause in the contract! (Clause 7C says the only time there’s a refund is if the cruise is completely canceled. Leaving late, coming back early, going to different ports? That’s not canceled.)
However, if you don’t read (and understand) the contract, and your seven-day Eastern Caribbean cruise becomes a six-day Western Caribbean cruise, or your Christmas cruise doesn’t go to any of the originally scheduled ports, you really don’t have much ground to stand on. You signed the contract when you ordered the cruise. Well, you clicked through.
If you don’t agree to the contract, don’t cruise that line. However, again, all the cruise lines have contracts that say pretty much the same thing.
I’m not saying don’t complain. I’m saying two things. First, when you’re bitching about your changed cruise, take a minute to remember our Caribbean friends. You had a vacation trip that wasn’t what you planned. They may have lost their house and their livelihood. Get some perspective.
I’m also saying when you complain on social media about the cruise line that “done you wrong”, don’t be surprised by the amount of people that have no sympathy.
Those are the people that read the cruise contract. Probably after their cruise was rescheduled last year.

How clean is your cruise ship?

Cruise ships are inspected, just like restaurants. (There’s probably more to check on a ship.) So, if you’re one of those people that likes to check the restaurant scores from the local sanitation department before your visit, you would be interested in the Vessel Sanitation Program (VSP.) The VSP is administered by the US Center for Disease Control and Prevention (the CDC.)

All scores are public information. You can review the inspection results and any follow-up reports here:

https://wwwn.cdc.gov/InspectionQueryTool/InspectionSearch.aspx

A passing score is an 86 which is a lot stricter than when I was in school. There are a lot of items that are checked, so there are a lot of places to go wrong, but some things are more serious than others.

There is also general information for cruise passengers available here:

https://www.cdc.gov/nceh/vsp/public/public.htm

If you just want the poop (ha!) on current disease outbreaks, go here:

https://www.cdc.gov/nceh/vsp/surv/gilist.htm#2019

Next time you go on a cruise, see how clean you ship is first!